Artwork by Becky Sanchez
Developing a deeper sense of His presence is my strongest desire. Why not? He has put up with me all these years, witnessed every single event, and He still loves and enjoys me. Who wouldn’t want to hang out with someone like that?
We realize quickly that we can’t will Him here or fake His presence. He is not with us to help us put on a show or impress other people. And He is not with us to manipulate this world to our own advantage. Praying for money is ridiculous. As far as I can figure out, He just wants to make us better than who we are now. And He knows how.
The wonderfully freeing thing is that we can be ourselves with Him—warts and all, good and bad, whatever comes into my mind. I have to watch what I say to my wife (every decent husband knows that)…but I don’t even have to worry about what I think to my Lord. Besides the obvious, two other words are frequently connected to our Lord’s attitude toward us: forgiveness and grace. That is like a blank check for a friendship. The lowest common denominator is to think: I can do whatever I want because He forgives and favors me. Really? I had a girlfriend once who I didn’t love but she adored me—it felt good for about three weeks. The whole point is for our love to become reciprocal.
Not that I have attained—ah, the dryness. I can re-read all that I am writing now in two days, during a low period, and think: What a load of crap I am foisting on people! That’s why words like perseverance and endurance and long-suffering appear so often. You don’t take a pill and pop on to the set of Basking in the Divine Presence. Saul of Tarsus? Don’t know—can’t explain—special mission, maybe? In my life, the change seems to be gradual. Sunlight mixed with rain—learning to appreciate the rain.
But I have also experienced the joy of knowing He is here. Inexpressible. The little beauties everyone sees: the dew on a rose, the reflection on a lake, the sighting of a hawk, the sound of the rain—those are his greeting cards, His invitations. I want to learn to love Him unabashedly. Without reservation. We don’t need to witness, we need to learn to abide (and He will witness). The calling is different now. We live in a post-Christian world. Everyone has heard of Jesus. They need to see Him—hello, body of Christ? I used to love seeing those rubber bracelets: WWJD (What would Jesus do?) Now we need to move beyond that: WDYWMTD? It doesn’t make a great bracelet, but it is a wonderful consciousness.
Wow. This turned into a pep talk. Yes, start to realize that He is here. Cultivate His presence. (When I play golf, I will talk to Him like He is riding next to me—He is a better teacher than coach.) Speaking of, discover those places where it is easier for you to connect—in nature, in your study, on your beloved back porch, in your bathtub. Cherish them, make them special. Believe that He wants to connect with you (I keep saying, the bridge is faith). He promises: I am with you always.
Oh. Wait ..is it what do you want me to do?
Yes, perfect. What do you want me to do? But, in my experience, His response is usually internal, not external.
What would your bracelet say now? I see “what do you want…” Urg help?